To-do lists are helpful.
I know.
I’ve written about them before. And I’ll probably do it again.
They help you stay on track, meet deadlines, and keep life from spiraling into chaos.
But most of the times, our to-do lists are a cage, more than a tool. We think we use them, but it’s the other way around.
Do you need some arguments? Here we are…
First, you probably won’t do everything on your list.
Be honest.. How often do you actually complete every single item on your to-do list? There’s always something left undone, rolling over to the next day, then the next (then the next, then the next…). And each time you glance at it, instead of feeling accomplished, you feel a little defeated.
A to-do list is supposed to increase productivity, but more often than not, it turns into a never-ending loop of unfinished business, a silent reminder that there’s always more to do, that you’re always behind. It’s not just about forgetting a few tasks. It’s about the psychological burden of seeing an ever-growing list of things still demanding your attention.
And what happens when you don’t check everything off? Guilt. Frustration. Shame. Self-doubt. Instead of motivating you, the to-do list becomes a measuring stick of inadequacy, where success is defined by how many boxes you tick.
Secondly, to-do lists are misleading, because they create a distorted sense of productivity, where only the listed tasks count.
If it’s not on the list, did it even happen?
Where are the spontaneous, the unplanned, the things that actually make life meaningful? Short answer. They don’t exist.
And what if a moment of creativity strikes but isn’t on your list? Do you ignore it in favor of something you wrote down days ago?
There’s also a false sense of control. We think we can plan everything in advance, but life doesn’t work that way. Urgencies pop up. Priorities shift. Agendas explode. And the to-do list is the last thing that matters. However, instead of adapting, we force ourselves to stick to a script written in the past, ignoring what we actually need in the present, and forgetting that a list is just a rigid collection of tasks that once seemed important.
Third (the most important one), they focus on what we do, not who we are.
Yes, to-do lists make us more productive. But at what cost?
Are we just robots completing tasks, or are we actually human beings that grow, evolve, and experience life?
This is especially true in law firms, the world I know best.
There, your value is often defined by what you produce. You are the contracts you draft, the cases you win, the hours you bill (well, especially the hours you bill…).
It’s an output-based identity, where the only thing that matters is what gets done.
But here’s the problem: the work never ends. There’s always another case, another client, another deadline. It’s a neverending marathon where the finish line keeps moving. And when your self-worth is tied to the boxes you tick, then you’ll never feel like you’ve done enough, because there will be always more to do.
So what happens to everything outside of the list? The meaningful conversations? The deep thinking? The moments of simply being instead of always doing?
Once again: short answer. They don’t exist
I’m not saying to-do lists are useless. They have their place. But maybe, instead of letting them control us, we should use them more intentionally.
Leaving space for the unexpected.
Measuring progress, not just tasks.
And remembering that we are not our output.
Because if we only measure our days by what gets crossed off, we risk losing sight of the things that actually make our work, and our lives, fulfilling.
Our worth isn’t defined by what we complete.
Who we are matters more than what we accomplish.
